what do you call a black person with no legs or arms? A poor man that clearly was inflicted very badly.

Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

Whats worse than Sandy Hook Massacre? 9/11

Q:What is harder than nailing ten dead babies to a tree? A:Nailing one dead baby to ten trees.

What did little Sally say to the clown after the party? 'For someone who specializes in entertaining children of a young age, I am slightly underwhelmed at the degree of humor my friends and I have derived from your jokes today.'

Girl goes to see a sex therapist. Girl says, "Doc, though this has never been a problem, for the past 3 months I have been unable to reach climax. Can you help me?" Doc says, "Yes.". And after an intense 18 months of therapy the doctor helped the girl to discover that her inability to reach climax was related to issues of childhood sexual abuse. And after another 36 months of therapy the girl finally found the courage to confront and forgive her unrepentant abuser, as she realized that by not forgiving him, it was like drinking poison while hoping that he would die. And though the doctor did help her,as he had said, the girl never regained her ability to reach climax again.

what do you call 69 babies in one room? a room full of babies

What did Justin Bieber say when he lost his tampon? Where's my tampon?

I bont really understand dyslectic peapole

What do we want? Equal rights for people with Tourette's Syndrome. When do we want them? Fuck!

Why did Amy fall out of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. (Who's there?) Not Amy.

god made the sea god helped invent the first wheel but as you know he also made me a really big deal !

What did the kid say to Santa? Nothing, he was a goat.

Q: On a plane, a black man does not grab a bag of peanuts, while everyone else does. Why? A: He has allergies.

Q: Why did Suzie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock-knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

How do you kill a blue elephant? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? Spray paint it blue then shoot it with a blue elephant gun

How did the terrorist die? He flew a plane into a twin tower

What do you do when you have a baby and your being shot by a terrorist. You use the baby as a shield.

Q.Whats the differents between justin bieber and a girl A.Nothing

Why can't women play poker? Because they're freaking stupid!

whats worse than finding 10 dead baby's in 1 garbage can... finding 1 dead baby's in 10 garbage can

An irish man walks into a bar... Hes met with an intervention of family and friends who are all very concerned about his drinking problem and well being.

Hum... I am actually a redhead... Which is so strange saying to anyone including myself, I dye it like constantly.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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