In Soviet Russia, man doesn't walk to the bar. The bar walks to the man!

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks.

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What do you call this? A sentence in English.

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So a man walks into a hospital to see his dying wife..... walks into her room falls over and then dies

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So theres a man, a horse, and a piglet in a helicopter. Upon noticing this, the pilot jumps out of the plane and the animals go crashing to their doom.

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A Jew and a Muslim walk into a bar. They end up getting into a heated argument. After about an hour of back and forth they decide that each person has a valid point, agree to disagree, and go about there business.

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In the North people say "once upon a time." What do people in the South say? "Y'all never gonna believe dis shit!"

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HALF LIFE 4 COMING OUT SOON!

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Why did the clock say 10:30? It was a digital clock!

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What did the Brontosaurus say to the Triceratops? Nothing. Neither of them have ever existed.

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What's brown and smells like shit? The rapidly decaying bodies of several dead chipmunks.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a would chuck could chuck wood? Home depot

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knock knok Who's there The police, I regret to inform you your son was killed in a horrific traffic accident

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Knock Knock Whos there? Your mom My mom died three years ago, please go away while i cry.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The doctor. You have aids.

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Me: Hey mom Mom: Hey Son Me: Whats? for dinner? Mom: I dont know

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epic win?

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What do you call cheese that isn't your's Well it would depend on what type of cheese it actually is

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So a man walks into a bar and he says "Can i have two beers?" The bartender says "Sure, Budweiser or Heineken?" The man responds "Uhmm... which one do you prefer?" The bartender says "Heineken."

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I <3 Hitler

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Why did the Muslim suicide bomber commit suicide? He was nervous and didn't think he could hijack a plane.

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Why did the frog cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

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What did the dead baby say to horse? Nothing, it was dead

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Q: what do you get when you mix a bull dog and a shiitzu? A: a dog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops