Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

What's the difference between me and a dead baby? I'm not dead, or a baby. I am well into my teens and very healthy.

whats worse than ten dead babies in one trashcan? one dead baby in ten trashcans

How fast is the speed of sex? 70 mph, minimum 40 mph

Why did the girl buy wine? She was hosting a party for four of her closest friends.

a jew throwing a dime into a wishing well.

A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "Haha, sucker, this is actually a glue factory" The horse is brutally slaughtered and his remains are sold for a profit as part of a glue product

Q: What do a dildo salesman and a car salesman have in common? A: They are both salesman

What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

What did the black man do with the woman's purse? Safely returned it to her

A horse walks into a bar. The barman immediately calls the local stable to report the missing stallion, and his owner promptly arrives to take him home. He thanks the landlord and offers a small reward, but it is respectfully declined.

It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

a man walks into a bar he is an alcohol and it's ruining his family

Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

Roses are red It's 4 in the morning I have full blown aids I'm going to bed now, this is boring

Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they dont make sense. Refrigerator.

What did the republican say to the democrat? You suck!

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have Alzheimers, Cheese on Toast.

Your mom is so...wonderful.

What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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