Why didn't little jimmy get anything for Christmas? He is Jewish.

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My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

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what did micheal jackson give to a young boy? -nothing micheal jackson is dead

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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What did the deaf Jewish Rabbi say to the Italian Priest. What?

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what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

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Hey guess what an antijoke is. What? a joke Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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my bubbles!

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Q: why are kittens so cute? A: because god created them that way. go fourth and enjoy kittens.

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What runs faster than a nigger with a stolen tv? His brother with the remote

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There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

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Why did the girls head explode while eating supper? There was a grenade in her food.

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Your mommas so fat that she may die.

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what smells like red paint but is blue paint?

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One

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Why do black people eat watermelon? It is a good source of vitamin C.

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Patient: Doctor, will I be able to play the piano when my arm heals? Doctor: Did I not tell you? You insurance didn't cover the cost of this operation. Your arm is never going to be healed!

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if a white guy, a black guy and a hispanic guy jump off a 10 story building, who hits the ground first? the man who jumped first. racist.

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What did the little crippled boy get for his birthday? He's an orphan so he doesn't know his birthday.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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Knock, Knock The door's open

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A guy and a girl had sex, it was casual.

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What did St. Mary Magdalene tell Pontius Pilate during the crucifixion of Christ? All this chaos is making me CROSS-eyed!

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What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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