hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your porch? Matt.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist -lschles

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What black and blue and red all over? My mom after my dad comes back from the bar.

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When life throws you lemons, duck because they freakin' hurt.

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What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

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What did the prisoner receive on his 44th birthday? Well obviously all mail in prisons is checked, but nothing dangerous was found. He received a book on different types of steam engines (he is a railway fan), some chocolate (galaxy caramel, which is his favourite), a crossword challenge book (he gets bored in his cell) and the anti joke book.

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What happened to the boy who fell off the swing? He got hurt.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if I had sex with your mother?

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I Wish... I was Charlie Sheen's Dealer

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Why do black people eat watermelon? It is a good source of vitamin C.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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vn[oiaehsobv[khpogjglprljffknfsiphgeknkldfekageriyreojgyperogerpojregkeporg? cuase u stupid and this stupid joke is to

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a Jew had a small nose

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Why didn't little jimmy get anything for Christmas? He is Jewish.

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what is worse then stubbing your toe in the dark? -september 11th

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What runs faster than a nigger with a stolen tv? His brother with the remote

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Two blondes are walking down the street. One breaks her left high heel and the other is called Monica.

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i was molested.

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Q: What did the priest say to the rabbi? A: Our God is a wonderful, loving god; praise his name.

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penis

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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Why was Jim fired from his job at the sperm bank? Continual absenteeism and inconsistent work.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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