"Free to play" Play free "right now" "Free forever"

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a group of mormons walk into a bar... just kidding mormons aren't aloud to drink.

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The first cow: are you worried about mad cow disease? the second cow: no, im a helicopter

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's been bound and gagged by kidnappers who are holding her for ransom.

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How do you convince a therapist that he is crazy? Hide in a fortress made of sporks wearing nothing but a belt, and start hissing and throwing paint at him repeatedly.

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Why didn't the chicken cross tithe road Because it was a motorway

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i killed a blind guy when he wasnt looking

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I was on Facebook today. Opened someones wall. Read "LIKE if you know someone that needs to be smacked in the face with a shovel." So I liked it and wrote my exboyfriend's name.......

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person 1: hey! guess what? person 2: what? person 1: i once saw a brown polar bear

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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I scream, you scream, we all scream for shit

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Why couldn't the Canadian taste the maple syrup? Because someone cut off his tongue. -BLLJ

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1-1 was a race horse, 1-2 was one too, 1-1 won one once and 1-2 won one too

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Why did the director call cut? Because he was shot dead by Nazis.

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Jimmy has nine bags of sugar. He eats nine bags of sugar. What doeshe have now? Diabetes

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Why did the kid trip over the rock? Because he was diagnosed with serious autism, and might die soon.

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A poor boy receives his first wrapped present in his entire life. Why did he hate it so much? Because it was a copy of "Mien Kampf" Is he Jewish? No, he actually does know what "Mien Kampf" is because he is poor and cannot read.

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Whiney the poo and the blustery day.

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Roses are red, violets are blue you may not know this but I'm falling for you . <3

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What's worse than 10 dead babies in 1 trash can 1 baby in 10 trash cans

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Rose are red, I dont give a shit. When I think of you, I play with my clit. :)

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What'd the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? New shoes and some gloves

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Bitch! Love, J.B.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a registered sex offender

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops