What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? "I don't like Asians."

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I haven't had sex for about 2 years, 10 months, 20 days and 4 minutes. It doesn't bother me though.

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Whats the opposite of purple? Your adopted

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What happened when the engineering student studied for a physics final? They failed.

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A: Ask me if I am an Orange. B: "Are you an Orange?" A: No.

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A midget walked under a bar.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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Why should people with Alzheimer's not tell jokes? To get to the other side.

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Whats better than Anti-jokes? Mtiscape.com

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roses are red, violets are blue, penis

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What do you get when you mate a rhino with an elephant? Nothing. This mating cannot produce offspring.

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Two babies wonder off from their home. They die of starvation because there parents could not find them in time.

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Why do mexicans eat tacos? Because they're good

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why were the negros at whitney houstons funeral smiling? because there were free sandwiches!

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What did one lion say to the other lion? Nothing. There was no other lion. This particular lion had horrible social anxiety so he spent most of his time alone, eating buffalo poop and playing World of Warcraft thus further alienating himself from the other lions. He was a very lonely lion.

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Why Didn't LeBron James go to College? He was really good and decided to go to the NBA straight out of High School.

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Why don't Black people Dream? Because the last one that did got shot.

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What looks like half a loaf of bread. The other half

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Why did the girl fall off of her highchair? Her father threw an axe at her.

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Why was the Jew evicted from his home? He forgot to pay the rent

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What did the black jewish homosexual say to the conquistador? Nothing as they were both from entirely different time periods.

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I told my grandmother to act her age.... she then died

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Q.What did the German say when he walked into the bar? A.Ich möchte ein Bier bitte. Das würde mich viel besser fühlen. Meine Frau ist gerade gestorben, weil ich sie zu Tode prügeln, und ich bin ein Alkoholiker.

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Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? A. From a catalogue.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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