I scream, you scream, we all scream for shit

Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? A. From a catalogue.

I told my grandmother to act her age.... she then died

What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because their both fruits.

Q.What did the German say when he walked into the bar? A.Ich möchte ein Bier bitte. Das würde mich viel besser fühlen. Meine Frau ist gerade gestorben, weil ich sie zu Tode prügeln, und ich bin ein Alkoholiker.

how do you kill an African baby ? put it in the microwave for roughly 45 minutes

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it did not realize it was a man-made distinction for constructed transportation vehicles and had a coincidental tendency to walk toward the area on the other side to find food or avoid birds flying over.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? It's socially acceptable to sit on a bench.

What do u call a joke with no punchline? A joke with a kickline

A black man walks into a bar The bartender tells him they don't serves blacks The black mans calls the Police and the bartender is arrested for Discrimination

Doctor Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains! Really? Well that's the least of your problems. Your test came up HIV positive.

You know what's funny about Fox news? Nothing. Lying to the public isn't funny at all.

What did the horse get for Christmas? Starvation and neglect because its owner has been dead for three months of old age and he was a raging, angry, achoholic so no one cared if hey was dead and/or bothered to see if he was alive

politically correct!

why was the apple on the ground? because it fell

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm an expert on flowers.

What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? "I don't like Asians."

roses are red violets are blue my dick hurts blue waffles

A group of young men walks into a bar. They drink some booze, laugh, have a great time and then go home to sleep.

Lol, okay you have made Nero of the clan of the Moralians the mighty laugh and go aww... Seriously, first of all, WHAT THE FUCK IS NAUSEUS? Secondly, okay its Ridge Racer, close enough, aww, seriously that sounds like the cutest thing, I mean did you bleed? DID YOU HARM YOURSELF! DELIGHTFUL... Moral: Seriously though, seeing you tilt over while playing a racing game, kinda cute, just put a pillow there next time you know just saying, because I play videogames, I cant go sexytime for hours without pumping some ADRENALINE INTO MY MIGHTY ROD OF STONEFLESH!

Why do mexicans eat tacos? Because they're good

Whats better than Anti-jokes? Mtiscape.com

Whats the opposite of purple? Your adopted

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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