Yo momma is so fat that she is overweight

Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

How fast do Jews cook? It depends how many you have in the oven at once.

What's the best thing about having sex with twenty six year old's? I am twenty one and prefer older ladies as I find them more experienced and mature.

do you listen to dubstep? OH YEA I LOVE SKRILLEX -_-

What did the widow get for mother's day? A miscarriage

Knock Knock Who's there? Your physician, you're going to die.

Why couldn't the blonde turn on the TV? The TV was broken.

Two kids walk into a bar and get arrested for underage drinking.

when life gives you lemons your like wait how did i get these lemons??

What's black and hangs from the trees in my backyard? Black berries!

Women's Rights Movement

What did the boy with no arms and no legs, who got cancer for Christmas, get for his Birthday? Nothing, he didn't live that long.

How are Lamborghinis and piles of dead babies alike? I don't have either in my garage. Except for the pile of dead babies.

You know what happens when you assume? You make a judgment based on incomplete information.

Whats black, dead, and hangs from a tree in my backyard? Your Mom

roses are red, violets are blue, im not going out with someone that belongs in a zoo.

Why did the man fall on the floor? He had a heart attack.

why is 6 afraid of 7? haha! because 7 ate 9 no because 7 is black

roses are red unless they are the pink ones oh yeah they're also pretty expensive

Q: How many jews can you fit in a car A: 2 in the front. 3 in the back and as many as you want in the ash tray.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger! Wrong. What doesn't kill you could leave you in a parapledgic state.

why are black people so fast? because there black

I like it, I like it becuase it is cream

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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