What did the blind, deaf, quadriplegic boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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why didnt the chicken cross the road? he did cross the road

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Whats red and cant fly a plane. An apple.

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A black, a muslim, and a communist walk into a bar, the bartender says "what will it be Mr. President?

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How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your porch? Matt.

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why is six afraid of seven? because seven ate nine

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? People leading healthy, active lives physically and socially.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs swimming? Drowning.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? Because it Died

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Hey guess what an antijoke is. What? a joke Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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How long does it take a black woman to take a shit? Why in the world would you want to know something like that? But anyway, the answer is somewhere, on average, between 10 seconds and 15 minutes. It really varies and conditions like irritable bowel syndrome and constipation affect this range. Actually it takes about 9 months.

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Why did the girls head explode while eating supper? There was a grenade in her food.

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Two gay guys walked in to a bar. It's unfair of me to make the assumption that they're gay, they just be really good friends whom aren't opposed to touching each other.

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What did the boy who succsesfully came out of liposection get? Diobeeties.

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What did John F. Kennedy say to Kurt Cobain? Nothing. They never met.

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Knock Knock. Whos there? Victor. Victor who? Victor Secret, the gay door to door lingerie salesman. Can i interest you in a plastic cup holder?

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(insert antijoke here

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist.

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Geuss what? Bob is wide awake and he likes strawberries but he didn't have any strawberries so he ate a hamburger but fred wanted a hamburger but bob ate it so he just ate bob but bob was wide awake so he saw fred eating him so he called the pigs to come and eat fred because pigs eat anything but the pigs had already eaten their daily freds so they ate bob because they hadn't already eaten their daily bob but fred had already eaten bob so they got angry at fred so they just ate him anyway but then they got fat so a wolf ate them but then some hunters killed the wolf and ate it so they are actually eating a hamburger because the wolf ate the pigs and the pigs ate fred and fred ate bob and bobb ate a hambuger but he actually likes strawberries.

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Pickup Line: Hay girl is that a mirror in your pants. Becuase I can see me in it.

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nick toth

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There are 3 type of people in the world. People who can count, and people who can't.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? A n a l

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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