I Wish... I was Charlie Sheen's Dealer

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Why do black people eat watermelon? It is a good source of vitamin C.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the man fall of his bike? He was struck with a falling koala. Why did the fish fall of its bike? Because it's a fish. What is fuzzy and might kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

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Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

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your mama is so stupid i believe she will have a difficult time finding employment in these rough economic times

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why, but I was standing on the other side of the road and I took it home and mamed the chicken with a powerdrill.

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What happens when you throw a cricket bat at a blonde? She is hurt and reports you to the police for anti-social behaviour.

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What did St. Mary Magdalene tell Pontius Pilate during the crucifixion of Christ? All this chaos is making me CROSS-eyed!

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why didnt the chicken cross the road? he did cross the road

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What's a bit smaller than the tallest man in the world? The 2nd tallest man in the world.

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why did the boy drop his ice cream? he tripped over his mother's dead body

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Oxygen and magnesium are going out OMG Think science the you might get it If not O oxygen mg magnesium

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How could they tell Michael Jackson was dead? He showed no vital signs.

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What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A car that is driving recklessly and happens to have a Christmas paint scheme.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

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What can be any colour and is made of leather? Cars. I lied about the leather part.

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Why did the girl buy wine? She was hosting a party for four of her closest friends.

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I just lost the game where if you think about the game then you lose the game. so did you.

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Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

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Knock knock Who's there? Labrinth Come in

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I got 99 problems... and an indeterminate number of them are bitches.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your landlord. I'm here to collect rent

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What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops