How come the black man couldn't be seen on film? He could be seen on film, he's not a vampire.

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What couldn't the Asian drive? Because he had just gotten laser eye surgery, and the doctor recommended that he didn't drive for a few days.

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What's 6 inches long, held in your hand, and has a round tip? A pencil you pervert.

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I Wish... I was Charlie Sheen's Dealer

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the man fall of his bike? He was struck with a falling koala. Why did the fish fall of its bike? Because it's a fish. What is fuzzy and might kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

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Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

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what do you call skiediving? a very fun but moderatly dangerouse sport that many people have fun doing from the ages of 19 to 31

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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Knock Know Who's there Interrupting ghost Interu--BOO!!! Ha HA!

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What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the world series? No Cubs!

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What looks and sounds just like a seagull ? A seagull.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your porch? Matt.

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My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

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A cow walks into a bar and says, "moo."

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There was a Mexican in a bomb shop ?

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How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

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Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

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Two blondes are walking down the street. One breaks her left high heel and the other is called Monica.

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A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

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A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for 4 beers. The bartender replies, "One at a time, mate, will that work for you?" To which the man replies, "No", leaves, and drives his 1994 Toyota Corolla off of the road into the pit of a volcano.

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Three nuns accidentally walked in to a bar and so they immediately went out.

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I just lost the game where if you think about the game then you lose the game. so did you.

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what did the girl trapped in the fire say? help

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What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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