A man and his family walk into a talent agent's office. The man proceeds to sexually accost his wife and children. The agent calls security who escort the family out and helps the wife find a domestic violence shelter to stay at.

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Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Weiner? A: You can never make "fetch" happen.

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Why shouldnt you throw rocks at a black kid on a bike? Because the kid wasn't riding in your way, you could get arrested for assault and battery, and he probably lives in a low income area and cant afford health insurance if he was injured.

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Q: How did that man get two black eyes? A: He was born!

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Why did the aeroplane engine fallon the house? Because of Donnie Darko

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Q: What did the priest say to the rabbi? A: Our God is a wonderful, loving god; praise his name.

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What's funnier than House? Family Guy.

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Whats better than pizza? Pepperoni pizza, if you like pepperoni that is.

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Q: What's the difference between an African American and a bench? A: An African American is a human being of black dissent, while a bench is an inanimate object that people sit on.

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what does the pope have against homosexuals a whip

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A kitten walks into a bar and orders a saucer of milk. Everyone enjoys the novelty of his presence.

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A man walked into a bar and said ow.

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What was the biggest turning point during Michael Vick's transformation from despised felon to MVP candidate? He stopped killing dogs.

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What did the blind, deaf, quadriplegic boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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a Jew had a small nose

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What did St. Mary Magdalene tell Pontius Pilate during the crucifixion of Christ? All this chaos is making me CROSS-eyed!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeline McCann.

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

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You're momma's so fat, she's got high cholesterol.

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Edward and Bella looked at each other. Then they both died. Oh, and Jacob is actually a transvestite.

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Hey, where'd my tractor go?

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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