What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

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whats worse than ten dead babies in one trashcan? one dead baby in ten trashcans

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a muslim walks into a bar, he then remembers his religion forbids the drinking of alcohol and walks back out

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I Wish... I was Charlie Sheen's Dealer

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Why do black people eat watermelon? It is a good source of vitamin C.

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Patient: Doctor, will I be able to play the piano when my arm heals? Doctor: Did I not tell you? You insurance didn't cover the cost of this operation. Your arm is never going to be healed!

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what does the pope have against homosexuals a whip

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What do you call a retarded man? Mentally challenged.

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your mama is so stupid i believe she will have a difficult time finding employment in these rough economic times

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What did the school bully get for his birthday? Beaten by his alcoholic father. Children are a product of their environment and his father's abusive nature towards his son forced the young boy to act out in class giving him the reputation of a bully.

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here's a joke a black man goes in a store and buy something

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What's worse than one bee sting? 2 bee stings

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Why was the blonde so stupid? He had dyslexia and to make fun of his hardship would truly be a hardship of human morals.

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What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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who did the strait guy marry? a woman

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What runs faster than a nigger with a stolen tv? His brother with the remote

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What did one muffin in the oven say to the other muffin Nothing food doesn't talk

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Whats worse than falling down the stairs? Falling UP the stairs.

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Leukemia

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Why's the sun red? It's not it's orange.........retard

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What is colourful and explodes in the air. I don't know but it sounds cool!

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Why did the woman keep getting sexually harassed while calling for her lost dog? Her dog is named "Ilovedicks."

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops