Which came first the egg or the chicken? The chicken because eggs can't cross the road

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Roses are red Violets are blue This doesn't make sense Your cute

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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Whats red and you can't see it? No Tomatoes

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Guy 1: "Hey, you have some updawg on your face." Guy 2: "Oh, thanks. Did I get it?" Guy 1: "Yeah, I think so."

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What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin boys? Thomas and David after his father and grandfather.

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Why couldn't the old man play the piano? His arthritis caused him great pain.

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Why did the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a truck

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Two people on a boat, Pete and Repete. Pete fell off and Repete radioed the Coast Guard, who sadly got there just in time to watch him drown to his death.

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty-six year olds? They're of legal age to give consent.

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What do you call something that comes out of a llama's butt? poop

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why did Sarah fall off the swing? because she had no arms. Knock knock! who's there? not Sarah.

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???????????? WTF?

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How did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Scarlet fever or meningitis.

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A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

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3 men find a genie lamp on the side of a road, The genie grants them each a wish as they surely deserve. The first man asks for a jet and the genie glady grants him this and the man starts to fly away. The second man says to make a wall around asia and the genie complies. The third man thinks for a minute and finally says fill it with water and as a genie the genie cannot refuse. They all drowned seeing how the jet had no fuel. The genie goes back to sleep and is picked up by an alien 5,000 years in the future, the Earth is destroyed in 7012(as if we didnt already destroy it). The genie survives and currently resides on uranus.

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What did the priest do when he noticed the young boy bent over picking up crayons he had dropped? He helped him pick them up

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What has four wheels and can fly? A flying car What else has four wheels and can fly? Another flying car

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Hey man how was your trip? great!!! It blew my mind

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In Soviet Russia, there are communists.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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did you hear the one about the boyscout and his scoutmaster? They had a lovely relationship, and both went on to be role models.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeline McCann.

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What do you call a Black guy picking cottnon? A cottonpicker

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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