what did the homeless man get for christmas.......................nothing

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What is worse than writing a really terrible joke on anti-joke.com? Death.

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Whats worse than getting raped by jack the ripper? Getting fingered by captain hook.

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What did the hat say to the scarf? Nothing.

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What do a carrot and a kangaroo have in common? Nothing...

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Liar liar, your dead nans carcass is on fire.

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Why did Jake fall off his bike? His mom threw a fridge at him.

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Q: What is the proper name for a female dog? A: Well there could be several names it could be a name on the collar in which case please look for the number so it can be returned to its owner. Another possibility is that it is a stray which you should either run for it could have a disease and you should just forget about the name then or take it in as your own and name it.

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yo mamma's so fat she's fat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Hi, Steve!

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3 Blondes walk into a bar. One ducks, the other two are hospitalized with mild concussions

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chipmunk fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do.

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Ask me if I'm a tree I don't need to, because I know you're not a tree

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Raveena Thandhan

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A little boy running with scissors he trips and falls and dies

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What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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If I had a penny for every time I said the word "the" I would have AIDS

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You were adopted and I couldn't think of a good way to tell you...

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A horse walks into a bar. bar tender: "Why the long face" *bu dum tss" horse: "My wife died of terminal cancer."

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What's better than having sex ? Having sex and being rich.

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If Chuck Norris were to roundhouse you. Then something previously happened before the altercation, that caused tension.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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