How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

thumb_up thumb_down +145

someone called a frog a frog

thumb_up thumb_down +125

Whats Obama's last name?

thumb_up thumb_down +119

Why couldn't the morbidly obese lady order a cheeseburger? A: Because it wasn't on the menu

thumb_up thumb_down +99

What is the difference between a botlle of sun lotion and a Mexican? A bottle of sun lotion contains a lotion that protects your skin against the sun, and a Mexican is a person from Mexico.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

What did the duck say to the man? Nothing. Ducks cannot talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

A man walked into a bar and said ow.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

What did the boy do when he was cold? He got a blanket.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why did the Calculus teacher give an Asian student an F on a test? Because he got less than 60% of the answers correct.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "Haha, sucker, this is actually a glue factory" The horse is brutally slaughtered and his remains are sold for a profit as part of a glue product

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Gale swallows.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

I got 99 problems... and an indeterminate number of them are bitches.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Kid 1: "Want a Hurts Doughnut?" Kid 2: "Umm... sure." Kid 1 opens up a box of freshly baked Hurts doughnut from Hurts Bakery and gives one to kid 2

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Knock knock Who's there? Timmy Timmy who? Timmy Smith

thumb_up thumb_down +33

You just threw a fireman and a baby out of a skyscraper... who arrived earth first? Adam and Eve. Moral: Because theology is bullshit.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Did you see the picture of Helen Keller's father? No. Lemme Google it. Oh cool; he had a beard.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why was the Jewish man put to death? Because he was convicted by a jury of his peers in a fair trial overseen by a judge in good standing in a United States court for 12 counts of homicide

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's black and blue and red all over? A person who was just in a fight.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what's funnier than 1 Mecican? 2 Mexicans

thumb_up thumb_down -9

26.5% of Americans are obese.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q : Why was the little girl crying? A : Because she tripped and hurt her knee.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did one muffin in the oven say to the other muffin Nothing food doesn't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -27

these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops