Two people on a boat, Pete and Repete. Pete fell off and Repete radioed the Coast Guard, who sadly got there just in time to watch him drown to his death.

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how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

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What's a bit smaller than the tallest man in the world? The 2nd tallest man in the world.

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What did the school bully get for his birthday? Beaten by his alcoholic father. Children are a product of their environment and his father's abusive nature towards his son forced the young boy to act out in class giving him the reputation of a bully.

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What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

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A mother and father heard their young son sobbing in his room, so they ran upstairs to see what the problem was. When they got to his room, they found the older son was dead and hanging from the ceiling. And the younger son was actually laughing, not crying.

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What do you get when you mix a dog and a cow blood everywhere

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Yo mama is so fat that it is obvious obesity runs in the family.

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Q: What did the diddler say to the little boy? A: Can i touch you inappropriately?

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What's brown and smells Iike crap? My brother he doesn't shower and is Hispanic

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs swimming? Drowning.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

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Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Too bad I don't have one.

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penis

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what smells like red paint but is blue paint?

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A blonde goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "That is a worrying symptom," says the doctor, who immediately recommends the woman for a thorough psychiatric assessment.

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What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? The spelling errors on anti-jokes.com

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what did the girl trapped in the fire say? help

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What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

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What did the lawyer get for Christmas? More paper work

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Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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What was the biggest turning point during Michael Vick's transformation from despised felon to MVP candidate? He stopped killing dogs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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