a Jew had a small nose

Why couldn't the old man play the piano? His arthritis caused him great pain.

Knock Knock. who's there? It's me. you need to be specific...

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the world series? No Cubs!

You just threw a fireman and a baby out of a skyscraper... who arrived earth first? Adam and Eve. Moral: Because theology is bullshit.

Q: What did the diddler say to the little boy? A: Can i touch you inappropriately?

My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

A man walks into a bar. He has three drinks, then he leaves because he realizes he needs to get home because he has to get up early to go to his job in the morning.

Q:Ask me my name. A:What is your name? A:Hey why do you need to know that?

Your d*ck is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

how many indians does it take to screw in a light bulb? one if it can reach 2 if it's high.One to screw in the bulb the other to hold the ladder.

Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

the world flooded and everybody died how did they die? the all fell into lava!

Why did the girls head explode while eating supper? There was a grenade in her food.

A blonde goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "That is a worrying symptom," says the doctor, who immediately recommends the woman for a thorough psychiatric assessment.

(Q) Why did the little boy cross the road? (A) To get to the police officer. (Q) Why did the little boy need the police officer? (A) because he was raped.

I Wish... I was Charlie Sheen's Dealer

A kitten walks into a bar and orders a saucer of milk. Everyone enjoys the novelty of his presence.

What did the lawyer get for Christmas? More paper work

What was the biggest turning point during Michael Vick's transformation from despised felon to MVP candidate? He stopped killing dogs.

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

A guy and a girl had sex, it was casual.

Q: why did the boy cross the road A: because he was being chased by a pedophile

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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