What do you call a man with no arms and legs swimming? Drowning.

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A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: I guess nobody's home. (leaves.)

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When life throws you lemons, duck because they freakin' hurt.

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Q:What colors make black? A:Nothing Thats a Shade

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A guy walks into a bar. Ouch

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When life gives you oranges, make lemonade.

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Q: Why did the man move out of his house? A: He found another, for a better price.

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Knock Knock Who's There? I am. I am who? I think someone has contracted amnesia.

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What's the most stupid thing you have ever heard? Woman's Studies.

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yo mama so dumb that we sat her down to take a standardized, comprehensive IQ test measuring spatial, logical, linguistic, and memorization abilities. Her aggregate score was an 87, indicated she is roughly one standard deviation below the mean of the population, which is not low enough to qualify for government assistance under the Americans with Disabilities Act (1990) but does impede her understanding of more complex abstract concepts and things pertaining to higher culture. In spite of this, she has raised a child of average intelligence, and has retained the same job at Walgreen's for 14 years, People seem to like her because she is polite and rarely late. Your mother is an inspiration to low-IQ people living in high-IQ developed countries, demonstrating that an inability to fully understand abstracts does necessarily lead to a life of meagerness and frustration, so long as you work hard, keep your spirits high, and accept Jesus Christ as your personal lord and savior.

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what is brown with wheels? a potatoe, i was just kidding about the wheels

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A chicken crossed the road and the farmer said, "Where the hell is that chicken going!?"

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A horse walks into a bar.. Several people get up and leave as they see the potential danger in the situation..

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Eating chicken off a baby's ass

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Roses are red Violets are blue This doesn't make sense Your cute

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Where do you put a black jew? In the back of the.... oh wait i have never seen a black jew before.

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What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? The spelling errors on anti-jokes.com

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What's worse than Hell? The Holocaust.

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Whats Obama's last name?

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What happened to the prisoner who dropped the soap while in the shower with other men? Another prisoner picked up and gave it to him and finished showering and felt squeaky clean.

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese lady order a cheeseburger? A: Because it wasn't on the menu

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

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Q: why did the boy cross the road A: because he was being chased by a pedophile

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why, but I was standing on the other side of the road and I took it home and mamed the chicken with a powerdrill.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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