Whats red and you can't see it? No Tomatoes

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Guy 1: "Hey, you have some updawg on your face." Guy 2: "Oh, thanks. Did I get it?" Guy 1: "Yeah, I think so."

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What did the blind, deaf, quadriplegic boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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An alcoholic walks into a bar. He is destroying his family.

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your mama is so stupid i believe she will have a difficult time finding employment in these rough economic times

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A mother and father heard their young son sobbing in his room, so they ran upstairs to see what the problem was. When they got to his room, they found the older son was dead and hanging from the ceiling. And the younger son was actually laughing, not crying.

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Why did the U.S.A. vote in a black president? Because racial prejudice is a thing of the past and the U.S.A. is a liberal and progressive nation.

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i said wut wut in the butt!

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What do you call a Black guy picking cottnon? A cottonpicker

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a blind man walks into a bar it hurt.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scottishman walk into a gay bar. And why shoudn't they.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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What is big, green and fuzzy and if it falls out of a tree and hit you in the head, it will probably kill you? A pool table.

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How did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Scarlet fever or meningitis.

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Q: What did the priest say to the rabbi? A: Our God is a wonderful, loving god; praise his name.

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Knock, knock. The man knocking finds a note taped to the door saying "we'll be back in a week", the man proceeds to walk back home and tell his wife that they weren't home and that he'll return the rake he borrowed from them next week when they're back.

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A chicken crossed the road and the farmer said, "Where the hell is that chicken going!?"

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your moms fat. she's ugly too.

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a muslim walks into a bar, he then remembers his religion forbids the drinking of alcohol and walks back out

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What happened to the prisoner who dropped the soap while in the shower with other men? Another prisoner picked up and gave it to him and finished showering and felt squeaky clean.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

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how do you kill a bear. -you shoot it.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs swimming? Drowning.

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A man ingested a hamburger. It proved fatal due to a tomato allergy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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