Sometimes I light my hair on fire and pretend I'm a candle.

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Whats pink and looked like an angry bulldog? Your moms vagina last night

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A duck walks into a doctor's office, and says 'Quack!' The doctor is offended and resigns.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What do you call something that comes out of a llama's butt? poop

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A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: I guess nobody's home. (leaves.)

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I went to buy some camouflage shorst the other day but I couldn't find any.

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a beer, drinks it and walks out.

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A doctor walks into a room after a woman has just given birth to her baby Doctor: I've got some good news and some bad news Mom: Whats the bad news? Doctor: Your Baby is Ginger. Mom: So what's the good news? Doctor: It's dead.

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One day a horse goes to a bakery store and asks the shopkeeper for a fresh loaf of bread. Surprised at the request the shopkeeper asked - White bread or whole wheat? To which the horse replied - Makes no difference cause i rode my bicycle to work yesterday.

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Why didn't andrea clean the dishes? She had no hands

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why does crazy george spin a ball on his fingers well? because he has a huge dingo

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What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Vast. While they are both mammals belonging to the order Carnivora, and therefore have a loose evolutionary connection, dogs belong to the Carnidae family and cats belong to the Felidae family. There would need to be much biological research done to discover all of the differences that result from this.

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Q: What do you call a black person that flies planes? A: A pilot you racist

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go stand in a mirror look at your face that is the joke. 8- now go tell someone you will tell them a joke and do that to them this will be a fast spreading joke. jkjk this joke is so bad everybody give this alot of bad thums. ha ha i do not care

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How do Elmer Fudd take a shower? Without a shampoo, he's bald..

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Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. The first muffin did not look over to the other one and did not talk to it because muffins are objects and do not have the ability to communicate.

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A chicken crossed the road and the farmer said, "Where the hell is that chicken going!?"

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Robin, get in the Bat-mobile!

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What did Little Timmy say when his house fell down? I'm not sure but that sounds like a very sad event that I hope to never encounter in my personal experiences.

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What do you call a Mexican jumping fences? A really good athlete.

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What did the blind, deaf, quadriplegic boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why did the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a truck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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