What did andy say when he went down on burger nips? Welcome to the jungle

poop.

What do you call two men riding a bicycle.

A kangaroo walks into a bar, he hops up to the bartender, and asks for a martini. The bartender, not knowing exactly what to do, goes into the back to his boss's office. He says "Hey, there's a kangaroo up front askin' for a martini...do we serve kangaroos?" His boss replies "Ya, of course, but these kangaroos, they aren't too smart, so charge him like 50 bucks for the drink." The bartender agrees and goes back up front to serve the kangaroo. He pours the martini and hands it to the kangaroo, the kangaroo thanks him and says "How much do I owe you?" The bartender replies "50 bucks." The kangaroo then reaches into his pouch, pulls out a fifty dollar bill, and puts it on the counter. He finishes his drink and begins to hop away. As he is leaving, the bartender says "Hey, wait, we don't get many of your kind around here, why is that?" And the kangaroo replies "I'm not surprised at THESE prices!!!" and hops out.

Why was the blonde so stupid? He had dyslexia and to make fun of his hardship would truly be a hardship of human morals.

What's 8 inches long and makes my girlfriend cry when I put it in her mouth? Her miscarriage

What did the Dyslexic man write on his Christmas card? Merry Christmas

A man decides to go hunting in the woods with a shotgun, he is going through the woods and a bear randomly pops out of no where, knocks him down and rapes him. So the next day he came back with an even bigger shotgun and said, "i am going to kill this bear" so he goes through the woods, the bear comes out of nowhere, knocks him down and rapes him again. So he comes back the next day with and even bigger shotgun and says, " i am going to kill this bear, skin it, and eat it" so hes going through the woods and out comes the bear, knocks him down, gets real close to his face and says, "you dont come out here for the hunting do ya".

pubic lice.

Why dont we just make fun of both? *mexican music plays*

Why mommy upset cause wet and sticky make mommy upset

Always bring food to the zoo. It's not the animals who placed the signs not to feed them.

Why's the sun red? It's not it's orange.........retard

Q : Why was the little girl crying? A : Because she tripped and hurt her knee.

YO MOMMA SO FAT... that it is really beginning to be an issue.

Why is the turkey always full? Because he is stuffed.

What happen to the ginger after he posted a joke? He was put in jail for 6 months, and analy raped in prision!

what did one lady say to another lady? we are both ladies

Why is the sky blue? Because when you look up at the sky, especially during the daytime, the sky is giving a bluish color.

Eating chicken off a baby's ass

Rose is Red Violet Blew Mustard is in Clue … What about Moni-… ahhh my eye!

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face." the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer."

You're mama's so ugly, she will most-likely never meet a compatible mate and die alone.

Whats Obama's last name?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...