A chicken crossed the road and the farmer said, "Where the hell is that chicken going!?"

thumb_up thumb_down -42

What do you call a redneck in a propane store? A customer.

thumb_up thumb_down -68

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face." the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down -124

what's blue and white and red all over? -nothing the "red all over" part implies a contradiction to blue and white.

thumb_up thumb_down +97

What do you call thousands of people starving all across the globe? Not my problem.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

Person 1: What's 2+2? Person 2: 4 Person 1: Oh, you already heard that one.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

A man walks into a bar and says "Hi everybody, it's me!" So everybody turns round. But it wasn't him.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What is marios favorite type of jeans? a brand that he enjoys and feels is comfortable in

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Wanna hear a joke? Good, go ask a comedian.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you get when you mix a dog and a cow blood everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man walks into a bar. He says, "Ow, that really hurt."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Knock Knock Who's there? Can people stop posting grammatically incorrect jokes on here. Half of the sentences do not make sense.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red violets are blue poems don't have to rhyme..... Refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Too bad I don't have one.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What is Ash gray Battleship gray Black Blue-gray Cadet gray Charcoal Cool gray Davy's gray Payne's gray Gunmetal Silver Slate gray Taupe Purple taupe Medium taupe Rose quartz Taupe gray Timberwolf WhiteApple green Asparagus Bright green Cal Poly Chartreuse Dark olive green Dark spring green Dartmouth green Fern green Forest greenGreen Green-yellow Harlequin Honeydew Hunter green India green Islamic green Jungle green Lawn green LimePhthalo green Pigment green Pine green Pistachio Sea green Shamrock green Spring bud Spring green Teal Yellow-greenAlice blue Aqua Aquamarine Celeste Cerulean Cyan Electric blue Jungle green Magic mint MintAir Force blue Air superiority blue Alice blue Azure Baby blue Bleu de France Blue Blue-gray Bondi blue Brandeis blueAmethyst Byzantium Cerise Eggplant Fandango Fuchsia Heliotrope Indigo Lavender blush Lavender (floralblack gray silver white maroon red purple fuchsia green lime olive yellow navy blue teal aqua a List that you just spent 5 min reading

thumb_up thumb_down -27

An Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They enjoy a few quiet drinks while watching a rugby match between Italy and France on the big screen, which is why they came into this particular bar. The Englishman hopes Italy will win, the Irishman is also supporting Italy while the Scotsman is up for France. France wins the match and the Scotsman says "Good game lads eh?" The others agree.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

thumb_up thumb_down -39

GIVE

thumb_up thumb_down -109

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

when i walk in the living room this is what i see... Luci's big eyes are stairing at me! (Luci is a dog) (Pita is a cat) I start a hissing and a scratchin and i ain't affrid to bite her, bite her, bite her, I"M PITA AND I KNOW IT!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What did andy say when he went down on burger nips? Welcome to the jungle

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Yo mama is so fat that it is obvious obesity runs in the family.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Dylan Eichas

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops