Why did the man walk into the bar? He wast thirsty.

how are a plum and a rabbit the same? they are both purple except the rabbit

how do you know if a black man's been on your computer it's gone

how much blow can charlie sheen hold up his nose? enough to kill Two and A Half Men

why do women wear perfume and make-up? 'cause they're ugly and smell bad

Wanna hear a dirty joke? I had gay butt sex.

Why can't blondes change a lightbulb? Because they're women

Patient: Doctor, will I be able to play the piano when my arm heals? Doctor: Did I not tell you? You insurance didn't cover the cost of this operation. Your arm is never going to be healed!

A monkey enters a bar and climbs up on a stool. The bartender asks, "What'll ya have, pal?" The monkey, who can niether speak nor understand English, appears slightly perplexed.

when i walk in the living room this is what i see... Luci's big eyes are stairing at me! (Luci is a dog) (Pita is a cat) I start a hissing and a scratchin and i ain't affrid to bite her, bite her, bite her, I"M PITA AND I KNOW IT!!!

Why did the old lady start crying? Because her daughter was raped and killed.

Why wouldn't the girl clean her room? She was paralyzed.

Why did the blonde driver crossed the red light? Because she has a good notion of physics and realized that the truck that was behind her was too fast to stop in time and if she braked there could have been an accident.

what did one farmer say to the other farmer we are farmers

Why was the blonde so stupid? He had dyslexia and to make fun of his hardship would truly be a hardship of human morals.

What do you call ten black men running down the street? A race.

guess how...chicken pow! guess who...chicken poo! guess when...chicken pen! guess where...chicken hair! guess what...your adopted.

What's the difference between shoes and a ginger? Shoes do the kicking.

Always bring food to the zoo. It's not the animals who placed the signs not to feed them.

Why a warm-harted man turned into cold-blooded? He's dead

How Do Bulls Drive Cars? They cant, they have hooves making it impractical for a Bull to Drive a car.

What did the guy who had cancer get for Christmas? Death.

YO MOMMA SO FAT... that it is really beginning to be an issue.

What did the tractor say to the cow? I'm a tractor, you're a cow, go figure.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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