Drunk guy... Hey i just maybe And this is number But here's my crazy So call me met you

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Q: What's green has four legs and would kill you if it fell off a roof and hit you? A: A pool table.

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How's a raven like a writing desk. you really are alice.

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Why is the black boy made fun of at school? Because the kids at his school are racist.

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What's the difference between a gay white man and a gay black man? Nothing because they are both sexually attracted to men.

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A monkey enters a bar and climbs up on a stool. The bartender asks, "What'll ya have, pal?" The monkey, who can niether speak nor understand English, appears slightly perplexed.

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Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

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What's the difference between an old man and a child? The old man is older than the child

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Why did the blonde driver crossed the red light? Because she has a good notion of physics and realized that the truck that was behind her was too fast to stop in time and if she braked there could have been an accident.

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SNAPPLE!

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Cole is "good" at soccer

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A man walks into a bar. He says, "Ow, that really hurt."

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Lol, listen, the suggestion lies in the "not not", you are using not twice in your mind, which under trance makes it so your subconcious registers that you are using a double negative while you consciously do not. Look back at the messages and register consciously that you and I have been using "not not" twice during the past messages, when the net shuts down here, you reinforce the "I will totally notnot, tell him" so the suggestion just gets stronger.

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What did George W. Bush say to his wife when he got home? I'm home.

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If at first you don't succeed.... maybe skydiving isn't for you...

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what did the 35 year old man say when he walked in his home last night? Nothing, he started crying because he saw that someone had viciously killed his guinea pig.

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Two monkeys are having sex. They both realize they're boys.

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What do you call a with no arms and no legs floating in the water? About to drown.

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Just call the fire department, they're trained for that kind of stuff

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Q:How many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A:Just Juan.

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Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

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How do you kill a blonde woman? Stab her in the stomach so all the acidic contents of her stomach slowly burn her flesh.

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A sheep goes up to to a horse and asks "Does you speak sheep?".The horse replies ''Neigh''.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because him and his girlfriend were in a bad relationship and he needed to get away for a while.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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