How many polish people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -One

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how do you know if a black man's been on your computer it's gone

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A little boy asked his mom what fucking was, so she showed him.

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Everyone is special in there own ways except for patrick whos demented

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What happens when Chuck Norris jumps off the 3rd floor. He falls to the ground and hurts himself badly

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. The first muffin did not look over to the other one and did not talk to it because muffins are objects and do not have the ability to communicate.

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Why couldn't the boy see? He was dead

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where can you find a monkey, a blond, and a bear? the zoo.

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What is worse than getting a 30% on a test? Getting a 29% on a test.

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What kind of party doesn't have cake? The Nazi Party.

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hi, im sober.

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A 65 year old man is tired with his life. He begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. He wants no part in the world anymore so he decided to commit suicide. On his way to commit suicide, he comes across a magical man that has an extraordinary offer. This magical man has offered to grant the 65 year old man the power to fly. The 65 year old man, accepts the offer in great interest, but the magical man wants something in return for his deed. The 65 year old man, offers all the money in his wallet to the magical man. The magical man accepts his offer of all the money and continues. With a flick of the wrist, the magical man says, "fly, fly, high as the sky, i grant this man the ability to fly". The 65 year old man is greatly excited now that he has the ability to fly. He cant wait to try out his new power. He runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. Too bad the "magical man" was really a male prostitute that was broke and homeless. The 65 year old man died on impact and the male prostitue walked away with a wallet full of cash.

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How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

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Anti-Joke.com Best thing since something better that preceded it.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, Others don't.

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Why a warm-harted man turned into cold-blooded? He's dead

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Why did girl cry? Because she recently saw the messy demise of her parent's marriage.

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Your mama's so old that typical places of business grant her the senior citizen discount.

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Sarah Palin

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How do you kill a blonde ? Shoot her in the head

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Q. Where do snowmen keep their money? A. A snowman is an anthropomorphic snow sculpture made of frozen water. They therefore cannot earn, keep or have any use for money.

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What is the difference between peanut butter andd jam! Jam is made from crushed fruit and gelatine while peanut butter is made from finely ground peanuts and is often sweetened with sugar.

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whats small and looks funny? A baby with a penis sewed to its face.

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What happens 2 seconds after you thorw a rock out a two-story window? The rock hits the ground.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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