A rabbi, a nun, a priest, a hooker, a stripper, 2 secret servicemen, a teacher, a midget, a ginger, a rodeo clown, a nascar driver, a homosexual native american, a heterosexual native american, 2 portuguese tuba players, an african american taxi driver, a blind man, his seeing eye dog, a bartender, 2 minor league baseball players, 3 lesbian mexican salsa dance instructors and a dwarf are all in a bar. They all had a good time and the teacher and one ol the portuguese tuba players ended up becoming facebook friends.

it all started when it all started when i was born because i was the resault of a broken condom and thats why he left. shortly after my mother killed herself. well thats the way the cookie crumbles. its not a joke i just needed to tell someone.

A priest walks into a bar, which is suprising because priests don't usually go to bars.

An alcoholic walks into a bar. He is destroying his family.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

How is nothing something if it is nothing?...

why did the bear eat meat? he was hungry

what is worse than a pile of dead babies? the one on the bottom trying to eat its way out of a pile of babies that have been poisoned.

Knock knock. Who's ther? Your friend Billy i've been shot and need help

How you learn to juggle? You ask someone for their balls.

What do you call 2 midgets and a pencil rolling down a hill? Satan

Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the fourth panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. -BG_Shank_A

What did Pittsburgh say to Philadelphia? .........Lightbulb.........

What do you do when you find a robber holding a 19 pound sack of poultry? Think life through and try to find out how you had this coming.

Knock Knock Come in!

A sheep goes up to to a horse and asks "Does you speak sheep?".The horse replies ''Neigh''.

What is the difference between peanut butter andd jam! Jam is made from crushed fruit and gelatine while peanut butter is made from finely ground peanuts and is often sweetened with sugar.

What happened to the blind man who went skydiving? Nothing but the dog was unlucky.The dog kept squirming and he thought he hadnt gone down the cliff yet and said "ok fine dont come with me!".The dog didnt survive. :'(

Your moma's so fat, she's got type 2 diabetes

Fat people.

Rose is Red Violet Blew Mustard is in Clue … What about Moni-… ahhh my eye!

Roses are red Violets are blue I regurgitate doorknobs

Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I'm color blind.

It's not just me bomber, Kane Aodhan and kevin are all posting stuff too so SBB!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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