- Anti Joke

69

Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

Leave. Now.

Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

A: you have a strong arm. B: yea i work ou- A: you can master bate a whale.

.sdrawkcab siht gnidaer era ouy ,siht daer nac ouy fI

In Soviet Russia..... the exact same thing happens, stupid.

why did susy fall off the swing? Cause she has no arms knock knock Who's there? not susy

Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms or legs.

I wrote a joke for 'Anti-Joke', I laughed, it was funny.

I guys look at this new game I bought, what is it, it's called penis it's supposed to be toatally hard

A pirate walks into a bar, and the bartender asks, "why do you have a wheel in your pants?"

Jeff comes home from a long day at work. As a result he is very tired. So, he decides to go to bed.

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Do you work at subway? Because I often enjoy eating there and i think the food is pretty good. I do not however eat there everyday because i might get overweight and get a eating disorder.

The baby started screaming in the dead of night. It woke up his mother, but his father did not be woken by it. why? Because the father left the mother some time ago, and emigrated to Australia with a new girlfriend, who is incidentially a model, and therefore he could not have heard hs child scream whilst on the other side of the world. His new girlfriend dosen't like him.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Nothing, shit went down so bad.

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Haulocaust Whats worse that the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

What is the best way to eat a dead baby? I don't know. That is incredibly disgusting.

Why was Jerry Sanduski at K-Mart? He heard boys pants were half off!

What would happen if an unstoppable object hit and unmovable object? I don't know, I was just wondering

There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only 4 ways out of this airplane..."

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite

Q: Why didn't the man give money to the homeless person on the sidewalk? A: Because he thought that he was faking it. Two days later the homeless person died in an alleyway from starvation. Nobody was there to witness it, and the body was never found.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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