A dog walks into a bar, looks at the bartender, lifts its leg and pisses on a bar stool. What does the bartender do ? He chases the dog out the bar and gets a mop to mop up the piss.

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Why was the gorilla crying? His brother died

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A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for 4 beers. The bartender replies, "One at a time, mate, will that work for you?" To which the man replies, "No", leaves, and drives his 1994 Toyota Corolla off of the road into the pit of a volcano.

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26.5% of Americans are obese.

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I've got a boner

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What couldn't the Asian drive? Because he had just gotten laser eye surgery, and the doctor recommended that he didn't drive for a few days.

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Roses are der, Violets are lube, I am dyslexic.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the man fall of his bike? He was struck with a falling koala. Why did the fish fall of its bike? Because it's a fish. What is fuzzy and might kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

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What did the lawyer get for Christmas? More paper work

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What's the biggest difference between the East and West Coast? About 3,000 miles.

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What did the woman say to her husband after he came home from a late night of drinking? Nothing, because the last time she did, she got her ass beat.

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Knock knock Who's there? Timmy Timmy who? Timmy Smith

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What did the black man do with the woman's purse? Safely returned it to her

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your landlord. I'm here to collect rent

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What's worse than stepping on a lego? Being eaten alive by a man-sized spider.

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Ice cream You scream We all scream Because there is a murderer killing our friends

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What did the nintendo Wii say as it went down the slide? They don't talk.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scottishman walk into a gay bar. And why shoudn't they.

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A cow walks into a bar and says, "moo."

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what is worse then stubbing your toe in the dark? -september 11th

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There was a Mexican in a bomb shop ?

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how do you make a joke act like yourself

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Q:What colors make black? A:Nothing Thats a Shade

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Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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