What did the woman say to her husband after he came home from a late night of drinking? Nothing, because the last time she did, she got her ass beat.

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A mother and father heard their young son sobbing in his room, so they ran upstairs to see what the problem was. When they got to his room, they found the older son was dead and hanging from the ceiling. And the younger son was actually laughing, not crying.

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How can you kill a blonde? Hack her to bits.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

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What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? The lighbulb isn't also dying of terminal cancer.

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Oxygen and magnesium are going out OMG Think science the you might get it If not O oxygen mg magnesium

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Yo mama is so fat that it is obvious obesity runs in the family.

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why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

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How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

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Why is it hard to fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

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Ever since I've been using chloroform as cologne I've been getting laid a lot.

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What black and blue and red all over? My mom after my dad comes back from the bar.

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Q:Ask me my name. A:What is your name? A:Hey why do you need to know that?

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A woman got in her car to drive to work. She kept her hands on the wheel and eyes on the road and was able to avoid any accidents that could have occurred.

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There was a Mexican in a bomb shop ?

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Hey guess what an antijoke is. What? a joke Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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Boom.

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Q: why are kittens so cute? A: because god created them that way. go fourth and enjoy kittens.

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What do you call a donkey walking backwards a confused donkey

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What happens when a japanese boy goes into a planet called Zypharecion which is 2000 light years away with 20% oxygen and 78% nitrogen and 2% of other earthly air elements and heats up a balloon enough that it explodes? He wont be at that planet because it does not exist and travelling at the speed of light has not been proven possible for humans.

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why do holocasut jokes make us laugh? i dont know you tell me

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A man walks into a bar He says ouch

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whats worse than finding 30 babies nailed to 30 trees? finding coal in your stocking at christmas.

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Ask me how old my cat is. How old's your cat? I don't know.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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