how many indians does it take to screw in a light bulb? one if it can reach 2 if it's high.One to screw in the bulb the other to hold the ladder.

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Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Too bad I don't have one.

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A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

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What did one muffin in the oven say to the other muffin Nothing food doesn't talk

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Knock, knock. The man knocking finds a note taped to the door saying "we'll be back in a week", the man proceeds to walk back home and tell his wife that they weren't home and that he'll return the rake he borrowed from them next week when they're back.

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A Woman out of the kitchen

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I just lost the game where if you think about the game then you lose the game. so did you.

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whats worse than finding 30 babies nailed to 30 trees? finding coal in your stocking at christmas.

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what did the girl trapped in the fire say? help

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what's blue and white and red all over? -nothing the "red all over" part implies a contradiction to blue and white.

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Dislike this!!!!!!

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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Q: What do a dildo salesman and a car salesman have in common? A: They are both salesman

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Knock Knock. who's there? It's me. you need to be specific...

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What's a bit smaller than the tallest man in the world? The 2nd tallest man in the world.

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What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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A man walked into a bar, he then fell to the ground screaming in pain.

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you know what they say... hydrate or die

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Why was Jenny walking home alone from school? Because three years ago her parents were murdered brutally by a drug dealer and social services haven't yet realised that Jenny is still living in the empty house.

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what did micheal jackson give to a young boy? -nothing micheal jackson is dead

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why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

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How did the square become a circle? Due to the period of recession in our nation, it was found necessary to cut corners.

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My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

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Did you see the picture of Helen Keller's father? No. Lemme Google it. Oh cool; he had a beard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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