Why was the old lady hard of hearing? She spent many of her young days blasting hard rock from her speakers/

Caitlyn.

Ever since I've been using chloroform as cologne I've been getting laid a lot.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cactus cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens butt.

Two blondes are walking down the street. One breaks her left high heel and the other is called Monica.

Duke: Hi Sally: Hello Duke: Nice weather huh? Sally: I couldn't tell ya duke, I'm not a meteorologist.

Why did the golfer take an extra pair of pants to the golf course? In case they ripped and he needed a replacement.

Whats worse than falling down the stairs? Falling UP the stairs.

Why did the woman keep getting sexually harassed while calling for her lost dog? Her dog is named "Ilovedicks."

What has two legs and graduated from ninja school? Okyrin Sakajuru. He also went on to win two all city titles and roundhouse kick of the day, performed on a wild tiger. As time passes, he stops practicing and becomes a lethargic street criminal. He is eventually captured by local authorities and charged with the robberies and two counts of aggravated assault. Leaving his children behind to the system where they are neglected and depressed about their fathers situation. He makes bail after 3 months and opens a strip club for dwarfs but loses it all after not finding stripper poles that are dwarf friendly.

Q: What do you call a bathtub? A: A bathtub

Q. Why do Puerto Ricans throw their trash away in clear plastic bags? A. So Italians can go window shopping.

So a Jewish man walks into a bar, You think Jesus being all knowing would have realized it was there.

I've got a boner

That moment when you and your friends throw snowballs at cars in the dark on the highway and the cops spotlight your area while you hide in a shed...

I Wish... I was Charlie Sheen's Dealer

What kind of cookies does a pedophile order from the girl scouts? Samoas...pedophiles love coconut.

What did the boy who succsesfully came out of liposection get? Diobeeties.

What's a bit smaller than the tallest man in the world? The 2nd tallest man in the world.

You're momma's so fat, she's got high cholesterol.

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

Whats worse than the holocaust? A n a l

What did Justin Bieber get for Christmas? An iPod Touch and a few nice sweaters.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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