Did you see the picture of Helen Keller's father? No. Lemme Google it. Oh cool; he had a beard.

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Edward and Bella looked at each other. Then they both died. Oh, and Jacob is actually a transvestite.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs swimming? Drowning.

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What is the worst part about being a black Jew? Having to sit at the back of the gas chamber.

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Oh look, I've found my knife

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guy 1... "do you no any funny jokes?" guy2 ..."no" guy1 ..."same"

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What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink? What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink?

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What did the priest do when he noticed the young boy bent over picking up crayons he had dropped? He helped him pick them up

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Ask me how old my cat is. How old's your cat? I don't know.

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what did the girl trapped in the fire say? help

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Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

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Knock Knock. Martha, get the door I'm watching the game!

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

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Knock Knock. who's there? It's me. you need to be specific...

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What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

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You just threw a fireman and a baby out of a skyscraper... who arrived earth first? Adam and Eve. Moral: Because theology is bullshit.

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What looks and sounds just like a seagull ? A seagull.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your porch? Matt.

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My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

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A dog walks into a bar, looks at the bartender, lifts its leg and pisses on a bar stool. What does the bartender do ? He chases the dog out the bar and gets a mop to mop up the piss.

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A woman got in her car to drive to work. She kept her hands on the wheel and eyes on the road and was able to avoid any accidents that could have occurred.

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Why was the gorilla crying? His brother died

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Your d*ck is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

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Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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