Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

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A mother and father heard their young son sobbing in his room, so they ran upstairs to see what the problem was. When they got to his room, they found the older son was dead and hanging from the ceiling. And the younger son was actually laughing, not crying.

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Boom.

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roses are red, violets are blue. Barack Obama says, nice to meet you.

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Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Weiner? A: You can never make "fetch" happen.

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how many indians does it take to screw in a light bulb? one if it can reach 2 if it's high.One to screw in the bulb the other to hold the ladder.

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How did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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Whats the difference between a chicken? One of its legs are both the same.

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So a Jewish man walks into a bar, You think Jesus being all knowing would have realized it was there.

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make me a sandwich!

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How do you know when Taylor Swift is dead? When you don't hear Boyfriend songs anymore

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What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

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What do you call a black person with a million dollars? A millionaire.

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You're momma's so fat, she's got high cholesterol.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, penis.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot, you racist!

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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Q. What's silver and cries? A. Someone who's been stabbed while wearing a suit of armour.

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There once was a man named Joe. Joe had AIDS, and killed all his friends and family The End, now go back to bed, pussy

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Ever since I've been using chloroform as cologne I've been getting laid a lot.

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Cancer victim: What kind of doctor are you? Person 2: I'm not a doctor. In fact, I'm a suicide bomber and am planning to initiate the detonation sequence right now. Cancer victim: Well, it doesn't really matter. No matter who shows up, I'll still die anyways. This way, I'll be able to pay a visit to the transcendent city high in the heavens sooner. Person 2: I bet that many would mourn your death at your remembrance ceremony. Cancer victim: That doesn't bother me. My friends and family are close to my heart, but that doesn't warrant eternal proximity with one another in itself. Person 2: Let's go to a better place. Let us finally break free of our mortal chains that have unceasingly been hindering our progress since the first war took place. Cancer victim: Wait, I've changed my mind! Person 2: Too late. I wish I had a time machine... not.

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot. *BOOM* Never mind, he was a terrorist.

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Whats the difference between a walnut and a baby ? Ones fun to hit with a hammer and the other is a walnut

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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