A horse walks into a bar. bar tender: "Why the long face" *bu dum tss" horse: "My wife died of terminal cancer."

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What's green, long, and covered in forks? Grass. I lied about the forks.

whats worse than loseing your dog? getting raped by a clown.

Why should children always be nice? Because the evil christmas demon KRAMPUS will rip their ears off, put them in a bag and beat them with a stick!

Two mice fell into a bucket of cream. They both promptly drowned.

What did the man in need of a prosthetic arm get from the hospital? A diagnosis for cancer.

Q: What is the proper name for a female dog? A: Well there could be several names it could be a name on the collar in which case please look for the number so it can be returned to its owner. Another possibility is that it is a stray which you should either run for it could have a disease and you should just forget about the name then or take it in as your own and name it.

One day a man was out fishing in the lake. Suddenly, there was a huge fish pulling his fishing pole so hard it almost broke. Luckily, he managed to pull the fish into his boat. It was the biggest fish he had ever caught and he brought it home for his family to see. They were all very proud.

What did Goldilocks ask the Three Bears? Nothing, bears are aggressive mammals and killed her before she could speak.

One game a Packers Player scored a touchdown and jumped into the stands. When everybody was touching him one girl put her hand on the inside of his thigh. He told the girl " If your hand goes a little higher you'll feel my touchdown spike."

??????????? ??????????????? "Hello, idiot teacher! You eat milk."

Why can't the T-rex clap? Because it's extinct

When Life Gives You Melons... You're Probably Dyslexic.

What did the man say when his wife said hello? Hello.

Q: Why didn't the blonde answer the call from her boyfriend? A: She had died in a rollover the day before.

You're such a baby, that you are still in diapers! Ew! How would you know creep!

What did the chicken say to the black guy? Nothing, humans and chickens can not communicate.

How many shots do you have to take to start feeling light-headed? Ask JFK.

How do you make a blond to shoot herself? You give her a gun and than ask her to pull the trigger.

yo mamma so fat that when she goes out in high heels she comes back in flip flops

Why couldnt the black guy swim? He couldn't swim because he had no parental figures growing up. His dad was part of a gang and his mom was a crack addict. He had noone to teach him how to swim.

Q: Why is Alzheimer not funny? A: To get to the other side.

If youre African, why are you white?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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