Why did the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a truck

Women's Rights

What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

What's the best part about having sex with twenty-six year olds? They're of legal age to give consent.

did you hear the one about the boyscout and his scoutmaster? They had a lovely relationship, and both went on to be role models.

What do you get when you mix a dog and a cow blood everywhere

Q: What did the diddler say to the little boy? A: Can i touch you inappropriately?

Snapple fact #572: You're a terrible person.

A man walked into a bar. "Ouch"

Whats worse than the holocaust? A n a l

What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Too bad I don't have one.

A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

Q: How did that man get two black eyes? A: He was born!

What happens when a japanese boy goes into a planet called Zypharecion which is 2000 light years away with 20% oxygen and 78% nitrogen and 2% of other earthly air elements and heats up a balloon enough that it explodes? He wont be at that planet because it does not exist and travelling at the speed of light has not been proven possible for humans.

make me a sandwich!

What does a turkey do? I don't know I'm not a turkey

If you lose your left arm, your right one will be left.

Knock knock Who's there? Labrinth Come in

My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

Q:Ask me my name. A:What is your name? A:Hey why do you need to know that?

How could they tell Michael Jackson was dead? He showed no vital signs.

Edward and Bella looked at each other. Then they both died. Oh, and Jacob is actually a transvestite.

Q:What colors make black? A:Nothing Thats a Shade

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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