What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "How'd you open the door?"

why didnt the chicken cross the road? he did cross the road

What do you call a horse with no eyes? A horse with no eyes.

how long does it take for a black woman to poop? depending on what she ate, about 5 to 10 minutes

how do you kill a bear. -you shoot it.

What did the homosexual eat for breakfast? A light meal consisting of fruit and whole grains, so he could keep his weight down.

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot, you racist!

Why was the Jewish man put to death? Because he was convicted by a jury of his peers in a fair trial overseen by a judge in good standing in a United States court for 12 counts of homicide

A woman got in her car to drive to work. She kept her hands on the wheel and eyes on the road and was able to avoid any accidents that could have occurred.

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish.

How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

How do you put on a condom Very Carefully

yo mama so dumb that we sat her down to take a standardized, comprehensive IQ test measuring spatial, logical, linguistic, and memorization abilities. Her aggregate score was an 87, indicated she is roughly one standard deviation below the mean of the population, which is not low enough to qualify for government assistance under the Americans with Disabilities Act (1990) but does impede her understanding of more complex abstract concepts and things pertaining to higher culture. In spite of this, she has raised a child of average intelligence, and has retained the same job at Walgreen's for 14 years, People seem to like her because she is polite and rarely late. Your mother is an inspiration to low-IQ people living in high-IQ developed countries, demonstrating that an inability to fully understand abstracts does necessarily lead to a life of meagerness and frustration, so long as you work hard, keep your spirits high, and accept Jesus Christ as your personal lord and savior.

guy 1... "do you no any funny jokes?" guy2 ..."no" guy1 ..."same"

A chicken crossed the road and the farmer said, "Where the hell is that chicken going!?"

So a Jewish man walks into a bar, You think Jesus being all knowing would have realized it was there.

How come the black man couldn't be seen on film? He could be seen on film, he's not a vampire.

Roses are red Violets are blue This doesn't make sense Your cute

Whats is pathetic and just plain sad? Gas prices these days.

A blonde goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "That is a worrying symptom," says the doctor, who immediately recommends the woman for a thorough psychiatric assessment.

whats annoying and black? black people

Why did the Calculus teacher give an Asian student an F on a test? Because he got less than 60% of the answers correct.

Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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