A blonde walks into a salon and says "I would like to get my golden locks trimmed." The haircutter replies "surely, just sit yourself down in that chair over there and I'll be with you momentarily." The blonde walks to the chair and sits down. When the haircutter comes over he asks her, "would you please remove your headset, I can't cut your hair while they're on." She laughs at her forgetfulness and removes them obligingly.

You just threw a fireman and a baby out of a skyscraper... who arrived earth first? Adam and Eve. Moral: Because theology is bullshit.

What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? The lighbulb isn't also dying of terminal cancer.

why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist -lschles

whats brown, lying in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs? a girl scout that got hit by a truck

Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Were your parents drunk when they named you?

Q: How did Muhamid Ali ( casius clay ) get a black eye? A: He was born

A man ingested a hamburger. It proved fatal due to a tomato allergy.

Why can't Jay cut his hair? Because he has AIDS

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? Because it Died

Why dont we just make fun of both? *mexican music plays*

Why wouldnt NASA send a blackman into space without a space suit? Because space is a vacuum there is no air no atmosphere the tempurature is almost zero kelvin so if you ever go out int space please dont take off your helmet out there because you would freeze to death almost instantaniously.

what is the difference between a Ferrari and a bucket of dead babies......... I dont have a Ferrari in my garage

Why did the chess grandmaster lose his mind? Because he died of old age.

What the difference between a black man and a pizza? A black man is capable of feeding a family. A pizza is capable of feeding an American.

i love u. so rate me good or i will talk to my lawyer. nothing personal, i just have no arms, legs, or nose and got broken up with by a girlfriend yesterday (and no, she was not fake) Her name was maria. On the bright side, my grandma woke up this morning!

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

Ask me how old my cat is. How old's your cat? I don't know.

A kitten walks into a bar and orders a saucer of milk. Everyone enjoys the novelty of his presence.

What kind of cookies does a pedophile order from the girl scouts? Samoas...pedophiles love coconut.

What did the woman say to her husband after he came home from a late night of drinking? Nothing, because the last time she did, she got her ass beat.

Knock Know Who's there Interrupting ghost Interu--BOO!!! Ha HA!

How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

why do black people like to play basketball steal shoot and run

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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