umm idk what joke to write down so yea and so rate this a thumbs up! okay bc this is an awesome joke...right right right yea ik!

A horse walks into a bar.. Several people get up and leave as they see the potential danger in the situation..

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

A man walks into a bar, he is immediately rushed to the emergency room

A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "Haha, sucker, this is actually a glue factory" The horse is brutally slaughtered and his remains are sold for a profit as part of a glue product

I got 99 problems... and an indeterminate number of them are bitches.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

Two people on a boat, Pete and Repete. Pete fell off and Repete radioed the Coast Guard, who sadly got there just in time to watch him drown to his death.

what the hell happened to your face

poo poo you you doo doo too too

What's green and invisible? This cabbage

Did you hear about the blonde who jumped out off a bridge? She was clinically depressed and took her own life because of her terribly low self-esteem.

what's funnier than a dead baby in a clown costume? philanthropy

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

What's white and cant jump? A Fridge

Person 1: Your Ugly Person 2: Your mom's ugly

you: knock knock person: who's there you: interrupting cow person: interrupting cow you:MOOOOOOOOO

One day a horse goes to a bakery store and asks the shopkeeper for a fresh loaf of bread. Surprised at the request the shopkeeper asked - White bread or whole wheat? To which the horse replied - Makes no difference cause i rode my bicycle to work yesterday.

If your yacht is if moving at 50 knots per hour in a wind tunnel how many leprechauns can you fit in a chamber? Even, because purple is attracted to bestiality.

Why did the girls head explode while eating supper? There was a grenade in her food.

whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

whats the main reason Mexicans have legs? so they can stand.

A mother and father heard their young son sobbing in his room, so they ran upstairs to see what the problem was. When they got to his room, they found the older son was dead and hanging from the ceiling. And the younger son was actually laughing, not crying.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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