What did John F. Kennedy say to Kurt Cobain? Nothing. They never met.

Why was Jenny walking home alone from school? Because three years ago her parents were murdered brutally by a drug dealer and social services haven't yet realised that Jenny is still living in the empty house.

Knock Knock. Whos there? Victor. Victor who? Victor Secret, the gay door to door lingerie salesman. Can i interest you in a plastic cup holder?

Why did the black man fall off the bicycle? He was shot at close range by one of a gang of young white males. This horrific violence was most likely fueled by racial prejudice. Our thoughts go out to the young man's family and friends.

Why was the boy embarassed at school? He got a noticable boner during class.

What did the nintendo Wii say as it went down the slide? They don't talk.

You just threw a fireman and a baby out of a skyscraper... who arrived earth first? Adam and Eve. Moral: Because theology is bullshit.

Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeline McCann.

Women's Rights

Why is it hard to fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

who did the strait guy marry? a woman

what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

how long is a chinese name. how long. yup.

When life gives you oranges, make lemonade.

Knock, knock Who's there? Landlord; you've been evicted.

What runs faster than a nigger with a stolen tv? His brother with the remote

GONNA

What's black and white and red all over? And old fashioned television painted red.

Duke: Hi Sally: Hello Duke: Nice weather huh? Sally: I couldn't tell ya duke, I'm not a meteorologist.

how do you wake lady gaga up? you hit her in the face with a frying pan

What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

penis

What's black and white and red all over. An interracial suicide pact.

How many blondes does it take to dye their own hair black and act in an intelligent, sensible manner?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...