what's the difference between a duck? one leg is the same.

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(insert antijoke here

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When life gets you down, make a comforter.

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What did Justin Bieber get for Christmas? An iPod Touch and a few nice sweaters.

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It's black, and when it falls out of a tree, your refrigurator is broken. Your refrigurator.

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why did the puppy have a sticky tongue? because its owner was abusive and made the puppy lick peanut butter from his balls

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what smells like red paint but is blue paint?

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someone called a frog a frog

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What happened to the prisoner who dropped the soap while in the shower with other men? Another prisoner picked up and gave it to him and finished showering and felt squeaky clean.

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese lady order a cheeseburger? A: Because it wasn't on the menu

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I Wish... I was Charlie Sheen's Dealer

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what do you call skiediving? a very fun but moderatly dangerouse sport that many people have fun doing from the ages of 19 to 31

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Knock Knock. No one answered, as the person of residence was not home.

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

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What did the blind, deaf, quadriplegic boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why, but I was standing on the other side of the road and I took it home and mamed the chicken with a powerdrill.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

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Why did the blonde driver crossed the red light? Because she has a good notion of physics and realized that the truck that was behind her was too fast to stop in time and if she braked there could have been an accident.

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What did the boy who succsesfully came out of liposection get? Diobeeties.

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Two people on a boat, Pete and Repete. Pete fell off and Repete radioed the Coast Guard, who sadly got there just in time to watch him drown to his death.

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Why was Jenny walking home alone from school? Because three years ago her parents were murdered brutally by a drug dealer and social services haven't yet realised that Jenny is still living in the empty house.

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Q: What do you call a pakistani that practices medice? A: Doctor

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What jew get for christmas? Your money.

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Why mommy upset cause wet and sticky make mommy upset

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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