Why couldn't the morbidly obese lady order a cheeseburger? A: Because it wasn't on the menu

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What did the blind, deaf, quadriplegic boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Suicide.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? This isn't a car

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

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when i walk in the living room this is what i see... Luci's big eyes are stairing at me! (Luci is a dog) (Pita is a cat) I start a hissing and a scratchin and i ain't affrid to bite her, bite her, bite her, I"M PITA AND I KNOW IT!!!

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what did the lonely boy get for christmas? the absence of a familly

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty-six year olds? They're of legal age to give consent.

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Do you know what would happen if you were to like this Anti-Joke? ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... I would get another like.

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A woman walks up to her man and asks him to take out the trash. He agrees and takes the trash out.

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What's brown and sticky? a stick.

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What did John F. Kennedy say to Kurt Cobain? Nothing. They never met.

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A duck walks into a doctor's office, and says 'Quack!' The doctor is offended and resigns.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's a chicken and it doesn't know any better. It probably doesn't know where it is much less where it's going.

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Q: A black man is walking down the street with a television, where did he just come from? A: Best Buy, he just got a bonus, and wanted to reward himself.

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An insane individual walks into a bank and asks for $500. The teller refuses since he doesn't have an account, so the individual pulls out a gun and asks the teller again. The teller presses the silent panic button, causing the cops to show up and arrest the gunman, but not before he manages to shoot the teller and the small child standing next two counters over.

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Wanna hear a joke? Good, go ask a comedian.

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You walk in to your room. 7 chickens on your bed.

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What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pliot.

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What`s 3 times as worse than a war? 3 wars

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How long does it take a black woman to take a shit? Why in the world would you want to know something like that? But anyway, the answer is somewhere, on average, between 10 seconds and 15 minutes. It really varies and conditions like irritable bowel syndrome and constipation affect this range. Actually it takes about 9 months.

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What did the guy who had cancer get for Christmas? Death.

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What did Jack give Jill for Christmas? Herpes.

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Whats pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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