Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had no arms.

Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

Q: What did the first kid say to the second kid before he handed him a pencil? A: May I have a pencil?

4 on three... 1, 2, 3, 4!

What did the chicken say to the rhino? Nothing. Animals can't talk.

What's invisible and smells like a carrot? A rabbit's fart.

how are a plum and a rabbit the same? they are both purple except the rabbit

How do you get a lawyer out of a tree? Lean a ladder against the tree and reassure them if they are apprehensive.

who wins a race a white guy or a black guy? depends who's faster

What did Jack give Jill for Christmas? Herpes.

Mum: Never put off for tomorrow what can be done today. Child: Oh, I was going to play video games tomorrow, so...

What is one plus one? I don't want to do math.

Hey buddy what's up? I justed wanted to know if you wanted to hang out tonight. Just call me and tell me what you wanna do. Ok that's it see ya. Oh yeah! I gave your mom an STD...sorry dude...it just happened. I hope your dad isn't mad. Again, really sorry. Ok bye.

what does a blue watermelon and a cactus that looks like a penis have in common? orange ya glad i didn't say banana!

what did one lady say to another lady? we are both ladies

lets see how many dislikes i can get from this...

Hey i just met you & this is crazy but Nia and Goober Made a baby

Rose is Red Violet Blew Mustard is in Clue … What about Moni-… ahhh my eye!

Why did the man murder his wife in cold blood? Because she was alive before he killed her.

Q. What's the difference between dead babies and celebrities? A. Nobody likes celebrities.

What?

What did andy say when he went down on burger nips? Welcome to the jungle

Invisible Television.

what did the lonely boy get for christmas? the absence of a familly

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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