What do you call a with no arms and no legs floating in the water? About to drown.

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Q: What do you call a black person that flies planes? A: A pilot you racist

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Why did Nicholas Cage cross the street? To steal the Declaration of Independence.

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How do you put on a condom Very Carefully

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. The first muffin did not look over to the other one and did not talk to it because muffins are objects and do not have the ability to communicate.

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A three legged dog walks into the bar and says, " I'm lookin' for the man that shot my paw." The bartender replies, "Your father was an honorable man, and I wish I could help."

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your moms fat. she's ugly too.

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What's worse than Hell? The Holocaust.

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If you lose your left arm, your right one will be left.

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Why did the postal worker go to work? Because he has to support his family so they do not starve like his dog.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a door? Various answers are acceptable. The door has hinges, a black guy has legs, etc.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when riding on a roller coaster.

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Q: How did Muhamid Ali ( casius clay ) get a black eye? A: He was born

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What is marios favorite type of jeans? a brand that he enjoys and feels is comfortable in

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What's the difference between a bird and a horse? - Both can fly, exept the horse.

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why did Sarah fall off the swing? because she had no arms. Knock knock! who's there? not Sarah.

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Why did the black guy punch the Mexican guy? Because they were in a fight.

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A French, an American and a Belgian are going together on holidays. I hope they'll have good weather.

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What do you call something you should prepare yourself for when having sex with a prostitute? A.I.D.S

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Q: If I have 13 icecubes, and you have 12 icecubes, how many pancakes can I fit on the roof? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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a guy who can fly walks up a hill and jumps off a cliff. his flying power fails him and he dies on impact

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how much blow can charlie sheen hold up his nose? enough to kill Two and A Half Men

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what did one lady say to another lady? we are both ladies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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