you know what they say... hydrate or die

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist.

What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

what do you call a grown man driving a plane you dont it isnt possible to drive a plane

What do you call something that comes out of a llama's butt? poop

Why did the aeroplane engine fallon the house? Because of Donnie Darko

3 men find a genie lamp on the side of a road, The genie grants them each a wish as they surely deserve. The first man asks for a jet and the genie glady grants him this and the man starts to fly away. The second man says to make a wall around asia and the genie complies. The third man thinks for a minute and finally says fill it with water and as a genie the genie cannot refuse. They all drowned seeing how the jet had no fuel. The genie goes back to sleep and is picked up by an alien 5,000 years in the future, the Earth is destroyed in 7012(as if we didnt already destroy it). The genie survives and currently resides on uranus.

what is brown with wheels? a potatoe, i was just kidding about the wheels

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a sludge hammer, the other is a watermelon

What the difference between a black man and a pizza? A black man is capable of feeding a family. A pizza is capable of feeding an American.

Why didn't the dog like baseball? Being a dog, it had no idea or interest in what baseball is.

Emo Girl: Whats Your Favorite song? Regulor Girl: Something Carrie Underwood sing!(: Emo Girl: Are you retarted? Regulor Girl: Well im not the one who loves Emos .-. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Honstley, I didnt right this my cousin told me to wriget this... i think its stupied... And Yes, Ima Emo but im not trying to judge people if there emo or not! :D Luv ya! -Angel- <3

What did Little Timmy say when his house fell down? I'm not sure but that sounds like a very sad event that I hope to never encounter in my personal experiences.

Q. What's the difference between dead babies and celebrities? A. Nobody likes celebrities.

Whats red and you can't see it? No Tomatoes

Bobby got a new bike there are black kids in bobby's neighborhood bobby doesnt have a new bike anymore

What did the blind, deaf, quadriplegic boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

Why couldn't the old man play the piano? His arthritis caused him great pain.

What do you call a black man on the side of the road? -A black man who needs a ride.

Three nuns walk into a bar. They realize they are in a place they don't want to be, so they leave, casting furtive glances around, fearing that someone from their congregation will see them and think they went in to drink.

What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

What did the boy who succsesfully came out of liposection get? Diobeeties.

What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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