"Grandpa, How did you know that Grandma was the one?" "When her sister dumbed me."

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Michel Moor on a die...

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Q. How many Jews can you fit in a blender ? A. 37 but you can try and prove me wrong

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Why did the man poop his pants. becuase he had to poop.

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I leave you with a riddle, I am round. I am an orange. What am I?

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I woke up today

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A plane crashes in the wilderness on the border of Canada and the U.S. Where do they bury the survivors? I lied. There were none.

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man: im hungry can i have a sandwich wife: go make one man: then what are you gonna do

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Roses are red My bulb is blue My pants are extending When I look at you

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What has four wheels and flies? A pile of poop that's on four wheels.

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But who would want to sell us out and why?

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All your facts check out, so I sent a little search team to find someone selling us out, it turns that they are after the leader of "The order" and "The king`s throne", so unless you got some small sub-department going on, point zero is in danger, ill explain everything once this is over.

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How do you save Africa. Put a rash of bacon in and envelope.

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If your riding a jet ski and the wheels fall off Then how many pancakes does it take to Cover a dog house Purple because ice cream doesn't have Any bones

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How many Jews do you have to kill in order to make a museum? 6 Million.

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what is friendship? when friends go on a ship

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Why are elephants big, grey, and wrinkly? Because if they were small, round, and white, they would be called 'asprin'.

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Girlfriend: Hey, you know whats the cutest thing ever? COMIC SANS Stabs girlfriend in the eyes.

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what did the black guy say to the white guy im black

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3 guys walked into a bar. The fourth one ducked.

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yo mama is so fat, when she stepped on the scale it said, 200 l.b.s

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What do you get when you don't wear protection? A baby.

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Person A - you must be tired, cuz you've been running though my mind all day Person B - i have no legs...

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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