I swear to drunk officer I'm not god.

How do you rescue a fat girl that's stuck under a car? With a pickaxe and a donkey.

Whats worse than death? Getting expelled from Hogwarts

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Roast Beef is a solid and Pea Soup is a liquid

Where did the boy go after the explosion? Everywhere

Why did the kid cry? He had a frog stapled to his face.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have alzheimer's, cheese on toast

roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry time for lunch :D

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A worm in your intestinal tract.

Who is the best person to do your nails with? Nobody, you have no friends.

Women Sports.

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

A chinese man walks into a kitten store. He is a nice man in search of a companion.

Daisies are green, poppies are white, I have a headache.

What's the differences between oranges? Trees don't have doors.

Chuck Norris threw a grendade, killed 50 people, then it exploded This is a highly improbable event considering no man is faster then a grenade

What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

Yo mamma is so fat, that she's going on a diet and is exercising regularly to lose wait.

A man walks into a bar, he asks if the bartender knows where Starbucks is. The bartender finds this exceptable and shows him the way.

What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

- Why Justin Bieber can't login to Facebook? - Because he forgot the password.

Why did the girl go to the hospital? She had an asthma attack.

interviewer: young man, do you think you can handle a variety of work? Young man: I ought to be able to. I’ve had 12 different jobs in 4 months.

What do you call a good anti-joke? something you feel like you should go to hell for laughing at.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...