what do you call a Palestinian with a large blade at the throat of an Israeli? a barber

What should you do when you're constipated? Poop.

What did one cat say to another? Cats cant talk

What worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

When life throws lemons at you, just give up and commit suicide!

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.....

Why did the boy commit scuicide? Because he was mentaly scared due to constant tormenting and teasing from his friends

Vaginal secretions

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

Q. When you drink two 5 hour energies, do you get 10 hours of energy or double the energy for 5 hours? A. You die

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

how much could a wood-chuck chuck if a wood-chuck could chuck wood? it doesnt matter because they can not chuck wood

What's worse than accidentally flooding your bathroom? A Tsunami

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

what did the kid with poleo get for christmas. whatever he has on his christmas list because his parents feel bad for passing down the genetic information(DNA) that gave him poleo.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was baked.

Remember when the new jokes on this sight actually used to be funny?

What did the boy do with his ice cream? He ate it.

It's long!

What happened to that guy who fell? He died from car accident 3 days later.

Q: why was the man punched in the face? A: I did like him.

How do you kill a retard? you shoot him in the head

What did the dog say to the other dog? Were both dogs!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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