Whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a sludge hammer, the other is a watermelon

You know whats funny? Things that aren't listed here.

What does a turkey do? I don't know I'm not a turkey

poop.

Chuck Norris was walking down the street when he was confronted by an armed, very desperate street robber. Chuck unfortunately made the decision to defend himself, and was shot in the gut before he could complete a roundhouse kick. The robber then took his wallet and ran off, undoubtedly to buy drugs.

Do you know the joke about the two guys who went to Paris ? Me neither.

Why did the blonde kid lose the spelling bee? Because she misspelled a word.

Why can't black people swim? Because most African American individuals grow up in inner urban cities where they have little or no access to swimming facilities.

Q: How did Muhamid Ali ( casius clay ) get a black eye? A: He was born

Q. What's silver and cries? A. Someone who's been stabbed while wearing a suit of armour.

why did Sarah fall off the swing? because she had no arms. Knock knock! who's there? not Sarah.

When life gives you oranges, make lemonade.

What did Justin Bieber get for Christmas? An iPod Touch and a few nice sweaters.

lets see how many dislikes i can get from this...

I've got a boner

Eating chicken off a baby's ass

what did batman tell robin before they got into the batmobile? -let's get in the batmobile!

Patient: Doctor, will I be able to play the piano when my arm heals? Doctor: Did I not tell you? You insurance didn't cover the cost of this operation. Your arm is never going to be healed!

if a white guy, a black guy and a hispanic guy jump off a 10 story building, who hits the ground first? the man who jumped first. racist.

What has four wheels and can fly? A flying car What else has four wheels and can fly? Another flying car

Why was the man sad after mowing is lawn? He ran over his dog.

Guy 1: "Hey, you have some updawg on your face." Guy 2: "Oh, thanks. Did I get it?" Guy 1: "Yeah, I think so."

what did the duck say to the chicken .nothing

That's a lie, buffaloes are extinct now

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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