kronkel spasm dizzle nork is short for: i cant believe you bought a ninja monkey to scratch your clownitis! i am randomly going to have a spasm cause i am down with that dizzle..... lets watch a show callled norks! i am pregnant with your baby ducky.

How do you hide an Elephant? You paint it's toenails pink and put it in a strawberry patch. Have you ever seen an elephant in a strawberry patch.? It must work pretty well then!!

Knock knock. Who's there? Jane from next door. Hi Jane how can I help you? Just wondering if my sister could use the spare spot on your drive tomorrow afternoon around 3pm? She is coming round for tea. I'm very sorry but my wife is due back around that time. Not a problem, thanks anyway. Have a great day. Bye Jane, see you soon, sorry again.

Fun Fact: If humans stood in a single file line around the equator, most of them would drown.

Whats so bad about all the black people in the world dying? The police would be out of a job.

Have you read Shakespeare? Dunno. Who wrote it? Shakespeare.

What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? Nickleback.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

why did the chicken stop in the middle of crossing the road? to get to the other side

What's the difference between oreos and your opinion? I asked for your opinion.

Knock Knock? Whos there? The police, please open the door.

what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

Joke: two polar bears were in a bath tub. One said "pass the soap." And the other one said "no soap, radio!"

Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock-eater.

We are as to jokes as atheists are to religion.

Friend: What do you call a farting dog? Me: A canine releasing built up pressure as a result of excess carbon-based gases produced by the synthesizing and decompositional digestive reactions in the stomach and intestines. Friend: ... Who is a nerd, pointless, has no social life, and cant take a joke? Me: No one. No one but you is that exceptionally lacking in character.

What happens when you give a math problem to a blonde? She works through it to arrive at the answer.

Why did the man put his money in the freezer? Perhaps he didn't believe in banks.

What's a cow's fovorite vacation spot? Farmyard animals do not receive vacations, they have long hours, no pay, and get eaten upon death.

Why doesn't Andy wanna bend over to puck something up? That's how he got assraped!

hello anomonous

The joke below was so funny I forgot to laugh.

How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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