q:What do you tell a deaf person? a:nothing.

What do you call a person with no arms? Armless.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Rhyming is hard, Zebra.

What does Snoop Dogg eat when he's sick? Chicken Noodle Snoop.

If you were expecting an antijoke you have come to the wrong place however here is a good recipe for a cake: Ingredients 2-1/2 cups 2% milk 1 cup butter, cubed 8 ounces semisweet chocolate, chopped 3 eggs 2 teaspoons vanilla extract 2-2/3 cups all-purpose flour 2 cups sugar 1 teaspoon baking soda 1/2 teaspoon salt FILLING: 6 tablespoons butter, cubed 4 ounces bittersweet chocolate, chopped 2-1/2 cups confectioners' sugar 1/2 cup heavy whipping cream GANACHE: 10 ounces semisweet chocolate, chopped 2/3 cup heavy whipping cream Directions In a large saucepan, cook the milk, butter and chocolate over low heat until melted. Remove from the heat; let stand for 10 minutes. Preheat oven to 325°. In a large bowl, beat eggs and vanilla; stir in chocolate mixture until smooth. Combine the flour, sugar, baking soda and salt; gradually add to chocolate mixture and mix well (batter will be thin). Transfer to three greased and floured 9-in. round baking pans. Bake 25-30 minutes or until a toothpick inserted in center comes out clean. Cool 10 minutes before removing from pans to wire racks to cool completely. For filling, in a small saucepan, melt butter and chocolate. Stir in confectioners' sugar and cream until smooth. For ganache, place chocolate in a small bowl. In a small saucepan, bring cream just to a boil. Pour over chocolate; whisk until smooth. Cool, stirring occasionally, until ganache reaches a spreading consistency. Place one cake layer on a serving plate; spread with half of the filling. Repeat layers. Top with remaining cake layer. Spread ganache over top and sides of cake. Store in the refrigerator. Yield: 16 servings.

What did the jacket say to the girl? Zip me up wait why am I talking

Is your refrigerator running? yeah oh...just wondering.

Just happy you are back Nero, I have no idea what a proxy is but I am at my mum`s place, is everything alright between us now?

A red and blue penguin are taking showers. The red penguin can't find the soap so he yells down the hall to the blue penguin "Hey, where is my soap?" The blue penguin replies, "What do I look like a typewriter?"

how do you get a 1 armed moron out of a tree? you wave

Q: whats worse than being in the car for 1hour A: being in the car for 2 hours Made by: grant chapman:)

A man walks in to a bar, wakes up the next morning with the news that they have found a cancerous tumor in his neck.

What did George Washington say before he crossed the Delaware? "Get in the boat."

A man walks into a doctor's office and says "Doc, I blacked out last night and have a sore ass." The doctor took some x-rays and informed him he had colon cancer.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither Has He.

3 Blondes walk into a bar. One ducks, the other two are hospitalized with mild concussions

Whats slippery and wet? A wet slipper.

Whats black and white and red all over. A penguin in a blender.

What's green, long, and covered in forks? Grass. I lied about the forks.

c======3

Yo momma so fat she when god said let there be let he said get the fuck out the way!

Why can't the T-rex clap? Because it's extinct

I had a really funny joke about a dead baby...but I threw it out

What's worse than someone posting a number on antijoke ? Someone posting about what's worse than the holocaust

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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