Why are fire trucks red Well fire trucks have 4 wheels, and they have 8 people in them, 4+8, is 12, there are 12 inches in a foot, a foot is a ruler, Queen Elizabeth was a ruler, Queen Elizabeth was a boat, boats sail the seven seas, fish are in the seven seas, fish have fins, the Finns defeated the Russians, Russians are red, And that is why fire trucks are red.

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

Q:What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor?

What's similar between a boat and a plane? Both can fly except for the boat

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get away from a gigantic tiger slowly stalking him

Q: What did the monkey say to the parrot? A: I like trains so feed me bananas!

The joke below was so funny I forgot to laugh.

Why did a vampire climb Mount Everest in the middle of the night on his birthday in September?

How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

Dear People who are reading this, I am seriously considering suicide. My Mom beats me and my Dad rapes me in the butthole until i bleed. I have no friends and the only way i get my nut off is if it is into a napkin. I often put peanutbutter on my ballsack and have my dog lick it off. It is the only time that i am happy. I have the gun to my head right now and if you wanna talk me out of it. I live in Lincoln, Nebraska. My number is (402)713-9565. Hurry before i run out of time...... and tears. Sincerely, Adam Claypool

I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road without their motives being questioned.

why did dicks dicks the dicks dicks? because you're gay and dicks

What is a man? A misserable little pile of shi... Moral: What is a man?

A man walks into a bar. He is an alcohol and it is killing his family.

How do you make a little girl cry twice? You rub your bloody penis on her teddy bear.

mark lawson likes boys

whats worse than 4 dead monkeys? everything! dead monkeys are awesome

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? There are many things that could be considered worse than finding a worm in one's apple. In addition, the matter of better or worse depends upon the point of view of the person in question, so what is worse than finding a worm in one person's apple may be preferable to finding a worm in another person's apple.

How do you get a nun pregnant? You practice unprotected sex with her.

What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter. It won't come to you regardless what you call it.

Why did the Nazi Doctor drown a Jew in the lake? To see how long it would take a Jew to drown with its big nose. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

What did little Mindy Granger find on her paper route? Human teeth.

Knock! Knock! "It's open!"

Why did Larry drop his suitcase? Because he had no arms. A) Knock knock, B) Who's there? A) Not Larry

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...