- Anti Joke

Some guy: Which of these is not delicious,watermelon,chicken,or kool aid. Black guy: What?

Up until today I thought eminem was the lead singer for maroon 5

Once upon a time, there were two brothers jumping on a bed. Q: The one stopped. Why? A: His brother fell off, cracked his head, started uncontrollably bleeding and died.

A piece of shit gets flushed down the toilet. The end.

Why did a jew die? It got killed by a nazi.

Q: What's the best way to eat lasagna A: With a fork, although a spoon is a fine substitute

What did the duck wear to go swimming? A bathingsuit!

What's the difference between a dead dog and a dead black man on the road? One's a dog and one is a man, but more importantly the differences shouldn't be noted in a miserable occasion such as this as both are unfortunate tragedies. Also, one has a big penis.

A bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "Can I have... ...a beer." The bartender asks, "What's with the large pause?" To which the bear replies, "I have... ...a speech impediment."

Why did the Monkey Fall out of the tree? ..It was dead..

Why did the giant try to eat the magical rainbow? A: Because the apocalypse is predicted for the Wednesday after santa gets shot by the evil jolly ice cream man which in secret is cheating on his wife who in turn eats every human baby ever known to man. duhhhhh

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What did the mother do when she found out the baby was stillborn? Gave it a proper burial, grieved for months and became a shell of her former self.

(To the tune of Perry the Platypus) He's a completely retarded Allosaurus of action! A purple dopey dimwit who always giggles away! He never does anything But children's songs he does sing And the little kids squeal whenever they hear him say... i love you, you love me He's Barney! Barney the Dinosaur!

Q.whats black and white and red all over A. half a zebra

What do you call 20 Investment Bankers buried to their necks in sand? A team building exercise at the beach sponsored by an Investment Bank.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

Three Arabian men are on a plane, they stand up, and shout BOMB, BOMB, BOMB! All three have Tourettes.

Penis.

Why did the woman fall off her bike?? Because someone threw a fridge at her!!!!!!

knock knock Get off my porch I've already called the police.

What do you call a dear with no eyes. A mutilated dear.

Why do girls enjoy listening to Justin Biebers music? Because he sings moderately well and appeals to a younger audience.

Fire is red Water is blue Earth is brown Air is transparent

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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