Why did billy fall off the sea-saw Because he got kicked in the throat

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What did the nerd say to his friend regarding the test they had just taken? - Nothing, he doesn't have any friends.

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Q: What's black, blue, and dead? A: My wife after our fight last night.

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What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

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purple pickles

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i stole a monkey from a man in a yellow hat his name is george now his name is i hate you

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Why did the woman scream when she saw her brother? Because he had just come back from fighting in the Iraq war and she was extremely happy to see that he's alright

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If your reading this you will realize that this sentence means nothing and I have just taken 5 seconds of your life that you'll never get back.

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Jeff has 45 candy bars. He eats 40. What does Jeff have? Diabeetus

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What's a word that describes someone annoying, black, starts with an N and ends with a R? Nagger

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Yo mama so fat, that she feels uncomfortable in a bathing suit.

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how did the man with just a head hide the fact that he murdered someone? im not sure but this seems highly untrue as someone could not kill someone with just their head.

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What's it called when an abusive alcoholic father iguana has trouble connecting with his wayward teenage drug addict son iguana, while at the same time the mother iguana doesn't come home till late hours and constantly calls her daughter iguana a slut? Reptile Dysfunction.

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what's the difference between a jew and a pizza? a jew is a member of a religion called Judaism, they're generally tall and have curly hair, however not in all situations is this true. They celebrate Chanukah and passover and many other holidays. Pizza is an italian dish, it's round, has red sauce and cheese on it and is pretty tasty.

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Q: The president is driving down the road, when the wheels of his boat fall off. How many ping pong balls does it take to fill the Empire State Building? A: False. Vests don't have sleeves.

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Why did Greg move to the Lake District? Because his dog died and the family is in mourning.

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You wanna know what's out of this world? The moon.

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Why do people like vacations? To get out of your family

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Why Did The Black Man Cry? KFC Went Bankrupt!

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The doctor. You have aids.

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Oh and Nero, what are you suffering from? Is it dangerous? Are you dying or something? Please dont scare me like that again.

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How can you tell a baby lost it's voice? It doesn't scream when you staple it to a ceiling fan and turn it on.

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Boy: what to hear a joke? girl: sure. Boy: woman rights.

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There is a really funny joke which can only be seen by smart people, it goes as such:

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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